Superintendent Refuses to Cancel School, Slips On Ice
Dr. Durtan, superintendent of WSD and reputed sith lord, was hospitalized Friday after serverely damaging his tailbone when he slipped on ice outside the district office. The injury came in the wake of a series of strong rejections by Durtan of appeals to cancel school. Just hours earlier, Durtan had issued a public statement: "School will proceed as scheduled today. There is no threat of transportation danger. The slippery conditions of which parents seem to be complaining are largely non-existent." Even in the hospital, Durtan refused to relent from his stance. In an email to the staff, he said, "My own personal incompetence at walking should not be construed as to reflect a lack of ability on the part of students and faculty to drive or walk themselves. I have every confidence that all WSD members will return safely home sometime in the next 10 hours."